Business is Booming! (laborers dead from the blast)

Dow record highs, profits up! Good news? Hardly. With wages stagnant since 2007, wage-earners are making LESS (adjusted for inflation) than they were then, while the wealthy are doing fine again. So don't worry: the government will make sure our CEO's and billionaires never lose money in a crisis.

"emergency contribution "

Another cutesy name for CONFISCATION! And of course, this is a one-time, only-in-Cyprus move (wink, wink):
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A top European Central Bank official insisted on Tuesday that the case of Cyprus, in which large depositors and senior debtholders were forced to take losses, would not serve as a model for any future bailouts in the euro zone.

The Cyprus bailout “was the solution to a problem that had become desperate,” Benoît Coeuré, a Frenchman and a member of the E.C.B.'s governing council, told Europe 1 radio. “Cyprus was in bankruptcy, that is something that doesn’t exist anywhere else in the euro zone.”

“The situation was so unique that it needed a unique solution,” he added. “But I don’t see any reason to employ the same methods elsewhere.”

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No?

"Haircut"...or amputation?!

CNN Money
Cyprus struck a deal with EU officials on a €10 billion aid package to shore up the country's banking sector. The plan will impose a levy on account holders with more than €100,000 at the two biggest banks -- the Bank of Cyprus and Popular Bank of Cyprus. (Popular Bank will be broken up immediately, and its viable assets will be integrated into the Bank of Cyprus.) While the exact percentage has not yet been determined, the levy on Popular Bank depositors could raise about €4.2 billion ($5.5B) towards the bailout deal, with shareholders and bondholders likely to be wiped out.
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If I had any money in any bank right now, I'd take it out and hide it in my attic. With interest in the sub-2% area, it's not worth the risk to principal that this new totalitarian mechanism represents. HOW CAN THE GOVERNMENT JUSTIFY CONFISCATING PRIVATE ASSETS??!

Big Brother Money Grab (FAIL? NO JUST *DELAYED!) = Global Bank Run??

EuroBankers tried to coerce Cypriot banks into STEALING savings from depositors! (Condition of bailout.) Oh, but only from the BIGGEST accounts. Anyone with any money in a European Union bank is trying to withdraw it now.
What a fiasco! But then you know U.S. banks will try to have the government do the same thing if they become undercapitalized because of mismanagement.

"“What we have seen in the last few days is a very serious blunder by European governments that essentially are blackmailing the government of Cyprus to confiscate the money that belongs rightfully to depositors,” said former Cyprus central banker Orphanides.